Awkward Moment + Thoughts

     For our final project in AP Language and Comp., our teacher is letting us pick any classic novel on which we will do a report and presentation. To get our brains thinking, he gave us a list of options, and briefly described each novel. Many of the ladies in class seemed intersted in the The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood. Our teacher told us to go home and think about it, and to try to choose one within the next few days.
     He presented the project to us yesterday, and sure enough, many students researched the books that most intrigued them. Today, as I sat down at my desk and began preparing my mind for molding, the girl who sits in front of me came racing into the room with a cringing grin.
     "So I looked up that book The Handmaid's Tale..." at which point she had to pause and take several scandalized breaths while she groped for the right words. "And it's all about women and sex and sexual exploitation." Her tight grin became accompanied with wide eyes, "It was so bad. I mean, it's all about..." She srunched up like an accordian and barely whispered the "S-E-X" word.
     "Oh..." was all I could say. May I remind you that I go to a Christian school with some of the sweetest, most sheltered people you will ever meet, this girl (and probably myself as well) among those numbers. All I could do was raise my eyebrows in mock-surprise as she went on about how hedenistic the book sounded, and how it wasn't something she could even bring herself to read.
     Of course, I didn't disclose any comments, because I'm sure it would have horrified her. The truth is, I want to become a pyschologist specialized in the field of human sexuality. That fact, combined with my love of reading, should tell you that I am intensely interested in any novel that explores sexuality, particularly sexual abuse, which is one of the areas I'm most passionate about. I am currently reading three novels focused on teen sexual abuse.
     So, I just kept the conversation at, "....Yeah.."
     Sometimes I feel strange for wanting to pursue this particular field, the discussion of which is often taboo, especially within fragile Christian bubbles (the other area of human sexuality that I'm most interested in is sexual orientation, so you can just imagine). Already, I'm feeling consciencious, because I know my Creative Writing teacher is going to read this as part of my blog project. What will she think? What will my parents think when I finally muster up the courage to tell them all this? What will the Christian community think if I ever step into the public arena with this topic(Dr. Phil gets enough crap just for having homosexuals on his show!)?
     Of course, one of my biggest flaws is that I'm too worried about other people's opinions of me. Whenever these doubts creep in, I remind myself that I want to be one of the few Christians out there who actually stands up and adresses these issues.
     Anyways, I should probably stop now before I roll out any "Christ Cliches." Just an incident that happened today, accompanied by a few thoughts. That is all.